current dilemma

here i am...still thinking about what the heck to wear for the lesbians wedding this saturday. it has been bothering me since weeks ago when i saw K and some of the crew at central.

me : "can i wear this shirt?"

K : "no."

:-O

it's a nice calvin klein shirt... dark khaki green... like the color of those old leaf (but not brown yet) you find in tropical forest... what the heck is the correct word for the damn color?! turqoise? uhhh....

anyway, it has been on my mind for quite sometime. as the date was drawing near, i was getting anxious... hey, a gal can be very anxious about what to wear on a big occasion lah!

1stly, i'm kinda broke right now because someone thinks that it's ok to owe me money for the longest time. moreover, the restaurant isn't packed with generous customers. if it is (or not), there are 'too' many servers to tend to the customers where waiting for the food from the kitchen is longer than the servers serving the food promptly. see how i'm using PRESENT tense? in short, if worse come to worse, only limited fabulous (sweet talker) servers are needed for the job.

what's my point again? oh yeah...brokeness. so, with all these jewish holidays where i'm forced to take vacations (coz restaurant has to be closed), i'm broke-r. there is no fucking way i am gonna spend money to buy any outfit/accessories for someone's big day. although i should. well...IF i'm comfortable with spending the money, i would. i gotta set aside some money for the wedding gift!?!

2ndly, with the limited money i have...i'd like to have those for my social outings. not that i spend extravaganzaly on gals at dinners or at the club. heck! if i'm well off, i'd splurge a lil to help the economy! ;-P well...i'm still helping the economy and the gay community by bringing my ass out at least once a week, spending lil money.

i think if there's another (judgemental) gal that ask me why am i always out at the gals night, i'm gonna throw this to her face.

"i don't have much money, but i DO know about recession and lousy economy! if i don't come out and pay that stupid cover charge and buy some beers, and IF everybody who is broke doesn't come out, where the gay community gonna have their hangout nights, b***h?!! i aint here for some booties!"
*flings head to the side and walks away*

3rdly, i've been quite androgenous lately...say about 3 years ago. in another words, i look tomboyish. cute tomboy. i'd even have gay guy take his second look at me just to make sure what gender am i. lol.

"you're (she's) soooooo cute!" is a compliment i always hear at least once a week. heh.

but only my close friends know that although i look butch (some says player) on the outside, i'm so femme (so far i'm always the one being played) on the inside. it's very true. the first time i heard that revelation from a close friend, i almost cried (in gratitute of knowing/understanding me). so, in terms of dressing up, i'd b more attractive and comfortable with a non-so-femme-clothes ;-) well...occasionally i'd put on make up...but don't ask me when, i kinda forgot ;-P uummm...yeah.

lastly, that baju kebaya (malay traditional outfit) has to go. i'm gonna wear shirt, tie and pants. with my blings ;-P and chucks! gotta be frugal lah. lol